The Casual Christian

If you ever cruise the Internet looking for a church, you will notice that a number of them feature programs that propose to connect people to one another. I went to a church like this once. There was an initial flurry of contacts from the staff and leadership and that was the end of it. They stressed the importance of getting involved in some ministry. So I took their advice and volunteered for a couple of programs. I joined a small group. After a full year of attendance, I went to their annual picnic. As I sat alone on the lawn eating my Kentucky Fried Chicken, not a single person greeted me. I felt no less isolated than I did the first day I arrived. “Nearly four out of every ten non-churchgoing Americans say they avoid churches because of negative past experiences …” according to a study conducted by George Barna.

Longing for a Church Home

Afterwards, I visited a number of other churches in this same town hoping to find a friendlier environment. This town is a very well-to-do community with a long Christian tradition. The founder of the local Christian college helped usher slaves to freedom via the underground railway during the Civil War. Billy Graham, the renowned evangelist, graduated from this school. The town is home to numerous Christian organizations. Collegeprowler.com, a college rating service, describes the town this way:

“The city… has a couple factors that are visibly reflected by its inhabitants:
1) [The] County is one of the richest counties in the nation, and
2) [The city] has one of the highest percentages of churches per capita in the world. As such, neighborhoods surrounding the school are mostly comprised of wealthy, white, church-going families …This creates a wonderful relationship between the local community and the College, but also makes it seem like the students are encapsulated in somewhat of a bubble, unable to see the real world.

Even so, the city itself has a cozy small town feel, with delightful parks and coffee shops within walking distance. The surrounding cities … are home to a much more culturally enriching scene.”

I found it so difficult to find a friendly church in this Evangelical Mecca that I began rating the welcome I received from various churches and sending it to the pastors. I either received no response or a defensive reply saying I hadn’t given them a chance to get to know me. Of course, a simple greeting at the door would have been the first step in such a process! Anyway, it is usually up to established members to welcome newcomers, not vice versa.

What Caring Community?

The early church warmly embraced anyone who was willing to risk life and limb to join their fellowship. No one escaped their notice. If they left, they were immediatley missed and no doubt someone followed up to see what had happened to them. They would certainly not be ignored if they wandered into one of the furtive little gatherings. The early church desperately needed the support of every member to survive in a hostile environment. It was hang together or hang alone for them.

Today it is eay to slip into a worship service unobserved or disappear right off the radar screen without anyone taking notice. Small groups try to bring a degree of intimacy to the fellowship, but seldom even scratch the surface of members' lives or provide the level of support needed in times of crisis. The reason? The modern church has defined Christian ministry almost entirely in terms of religious education. Church facilities resemble nothing more than college campuses with their lecture hall, classrooms, gymnasium and cafeterias. Small groups, Sunday School classes, and worship services all provide a medium for doing Bible study. But where are these Bible lessons put into practice by the Christian community?  Paul addressed most of his letters to the churches, not just the leadership,  because they practiced the faith corporately. These letters were read publicly to the entire membership during church gatherings.

The best example of this tendency of the modern church to emphasize theory over practice is the failure to implement the one another's of the Bible. Bear one another's burdens, love one another, honor one another, welcome one another with a holy kiss, accept one another, live in harmony with one another, be devoted to one another, forgive one another, bear with one another, admonish one another, encourage one another, etc. These are all things done together in close community, something  most churches do not provide.

You see, the modern church is not a 'one another' kind of institution. It is all about me and my personal reltionship with Jesus Christ. It is about my spiritual growth. It is about my stewardship, my witness, my faithfulness. And while these things are important, they need to be tied into the life of the body of Christ by the one anothers.

My son was abused by a TEAM missionary. I have sought relief from some of the terrible emotional and financial burdens this incident placed on me and my family. The mission still denies any responsibility, so I am stuck with hundreds of thousands of dollars in rehabilitation, boarding school, and lost wages due to an emotional breakdown from the stress. My wife blamed me for my son's problems and drove me out of my home so she could carry on an affair with her boss. She took everything she could get her hands on in the process.

I appealed to pastors, friends, family, TEAM supporters and many others to apply some pressure on TEAM to help out with the expenses they created. Not a single  person was willing to lift a finger. Many people expressed sympathy or offered prayers but declined to confront TEAM leaders. Because the modern church has so individualized the faith experience, people are expected to handle their own problems. Others never see the need for joint action on another's behalf.

Recently I met a brother who has been staying at a mission because he is unemployed and cannot afford rent. He spoke in glowing terms of his church so I asked him if he had approached the leadership for help. He had not even considered the possibility, but his lack of expectations had not diminished his enthusiasm one iota. When I gave him some money to help tide him over until he found suitable housing, he didn't know what to say. This kind of gesture should be commonplace among Christians. I also sent some money to one of the other victims of the pedophile who molested my son. His immediate response was, "What do you want from me?" He was an independent businessman who was suffering from the recession and totally tapped out. Unfortunately, this response to a spontaneous gift is not uncommon. What a difference from the early church which shared sacrificially with hurting members and other churches that experienced hardship.